Desperate Housewives《绝望的主妇》第二季第二十一集完整中英文对照剧本.docx

剧情回顾Previouslyon.除非收养程序最终定为合法Untiltheadoptionislegallyfinalized,否则生母仍然可以改变她的主意thebirthmothercanstillchangehermind,而且她已经改变主意授权文件已经发布andshehas.Warrantswereissued.我IE要解雇汤姆如果你解雇他他会起诉你mgoingtofireTom.Ifyoujustfirehim,he'llsueyou,而且我会支持他你需要个好的理由and11backhimup.Youneedcause.嗯我想我会找到的决定已经做出.Well,Iguessllhavetofindcause.Decisionsweremade.我准备干些惊天动地的事mgoingtodosomethingsoawful,定要让她的生活地洞山摇itisgoingtorockherworld.恐吓已经说出.Threatswerespoken.接下来我们怎么办？Sowhatthehellarewegonnado?计划是Andplans.镇静安眠剂？Phenobarbital?是时候给你弟弟他应该得到的安静了It'stimetogiveyourbrotherthepeacehedeserves.已经实施Wereputintoaction.最佳私♥人♥侦♥探♥Themostsuccessfulprivateinvestigator公平地讲是一个叫奥利弗.韦斯顿的人inFairviewwasamannamedOliverWeston.尽其所想奥利弗肯定不记得Trythoughhemight,Olivercouldn'tremember他开始不相信真爱的确切时间theexactmomenthestoppedbelievinginlove.是那天晚上他抓拍到的那个经理Wasitthenighthecaughtanexecutive正在背地里与他的秘书？cheatingwithhissecretary?或者是否是那天他看到的那个主妇Orwasitthedayhesawahousewife背地里与她的投递员？cheatingwithherdeliveryboy?或者是否是那个时候他抓拍到隔壁的女孩Orwasitthetimehecaughtthegirlnextdoor背地里与住在对街的那对夫妇？cheatingwiththecouplewholivedacrossthestreet?无论何时Wheneverthemoment,奥利弗.韦斯顿现在确确实实是一个愤世嫉俗的人OliverWestonwasnowofficiallyacynic他只相信背叛和怀疑whoonlybelievedinbetrayalandsuspicion.对奥利弗幸运的是那就是他的经济来源1.uckilyforOliver,that'swhatpaidhisbills.你忘了我们的争吵Okay,youforgotfighting.你在干什么？Whatareyoudoing?不好意思这是你家的矮树丛吗？Oh.Sorry,man.Aretheseyourbushes?我走的时候会清理干净的.I'llcleanthatallupwhenmdone.会看上去我没来过这儿的It'llbelikeIwasnothere.你现在就已经结束了放松大个子You'redonenow.Whoa,easy,bigfella.我只是个从事家庭调查的私♥家♥侦♥探♥mjustap.I.Doingadomesticsurveillancejob.为谁工作？Forwho?街道末尾那位金发碧眼的女郎Theblondeladyattheendofthestreet.伊迪.布利特？Ediebritt?嗯那是他的未婚夫Yeah.That'sherfiance.显然他为了另一个女人甩了她Apparently,hedumpedherforanotherwoman,而我只是要找出究竟是谁andIjustfiguredoutwho.苏珊？（笑声）那边根本没发生任何事Susan?There,snothinggoingonthere.他们曾经结过婚她只是和他在交谈Theyusedtobemarried.She,sonlytalkingtohim因为他们有一个孩子而我所知他们正在计划第二个孩子becausetheyhaveakidtogether.FromwhatIheard,they'reontheirwaytokidnumbertwo.你不知道你究竟在说什么你不知道这些职业妇女就像我所说的那样Well,youdon'tknowwhatyou'retalkingabout.Yeah,andyoudon'tknowthesesoccermomslikeIdo.白天她们做小甜点以及一起用车Byday,theybakecookiesandcarpool.夜幕降临她们完全就是小人Butdimthelightsandbam.Theyturnintototalpigs.（模仿猪叫）她并不像你所说的那样She'snotlikethat看看她Oh,please.1.ookather.那个女人显然知道她的生活方式就是围绕一个床垫Thatwomanclearlyknowsherwayaroundamattress.奥利弗.韦斯顿已经变成了一个愤世嫉俗的人Yes,OliverWestonhadbecomeacynic,所以他无法分辨出whichiswhyhecouldn,trecognize一个仍然坠入爱河的男人amanwhowasstillinlove.每个家庭都有隐藏Everyfamilyhasawayofhiding不想被别人所知的方法whatitdoesn,twantseen.无论是一幅Whetherit'swithapicture遮盖墙壁上污点的画thatcoversastainonthewall.或者是一个紧闭的房♥门隐藏里面的杂乱无章Orwithaclosetdoorthatconcealsthechaosinside.或者是虚伪的笑容Orwithartificialsmiles掩盖了多年的痛苦和悲哀thatmaskyearsofpainandheartache,每个家庭都习惯于everyfamilygoestogreatlengths掩盖丑陋的事实tohideuglytruths.有一些理所应当走的更远Some,ofcourse,gofurtherthanothers.你今晚就要这么做？Soareyougonnadothistonight?不是这边冰激凌是为明天准备的No,theicecreamisfortomorrow.我准备带卡博去岩水湖野餐mtakingCalebonapicnictorockwaterlake.我正在准备他最爱吃的mpreparingallofhisfavoritefoods.你一旦做完所应该做的你就Sowhenyou'redone,you'rejustgonna.让他一个人呆在哪儿？1.eavehimlyingthere?不No.我会匿名打911llcall9-1-1anonymously,但是我会在远处看着他确保butIwillbewatchingfromadistancetomakesure那个.（断断续续）让他们带走他的尸体that.Thattheypickuphisbody.你知道母亲这不是你一定要做的Youknow,mom,youdon'thavetodothis.我不会让他再伤害别的女孩了Iwon'tlethimhurtanothergirl,而且我也不会把他转交给andIwillnotturnhimover那些会嘲弄和虐待他的人手中topeoplewhowillmockandabusehim.我不会Ijustwon't.他在这世界上的最后一天Hislastdayonthisearth一定是完美的isgoingtobeaperfectone.（柔弱的哭声）哦不了谢谢萧梅Oh,no,thanks,xiao-Mei.糟糕的是她仍然留恋莉莉Thepoorthing.Shewassoattachedto1.ily.这些食物哪里来的？Where'dallthisfoodcomefrom?从卡洛斯的教堂那帮人ThepeoplefromCarlos'church.那你觉得你和卡洛斯会再尝试一次领养吗？SoyouthinkyouandCarloswilltryforanotheradoption?我觉得我不可能再一次经受那种痛苦了hmm.1don'tthinkIcouldgothroughthatpainagain.Hmm.我曾经冷冻过我的一些卵子所以我们可能Ididfreezesomeofmyeggs,sowemight找个代♥孕♥母亲之类的但我不是很清楚dothesurrogacything,butIdon'tknow.甜心你该吃点东西我感觉没什么胃口Honey,you'vegottoeatsomething.Idon,thaveanappetite.事实上这些看来要浪费了Infact,thisisallgonnagotowaste.你们应该随便拿掉些不不你留着吧Youguysshouldtakesomething,No,no,youshouldkeepit.我拿一对好了lltakeacouple.怎么了？卡尔甩了我所以我又一个人了What?KarIdumpedme,somalone.食物可以填满空虚Foodfillsthevoid.萧梅我了解你的不幸但这？Xiao-Mei,Iappreciateyourgrief,but,really,你把每个人的心情都搞的很糟了你是不是真的要搞的一团糟呢？you'rebringingeverybodydown.Willyoupullittogether?索利斯夫人Mrs.Solis.我不是很清楚这是政♥府♥给我的Idon'tunderstand.It'sfromthegovernment.让我看下1.etmesee.加布她要被驱逐出境了Gaby,she'sbeingdeported.萧梅这是不是你收到的像这样的Xiao-Mei,isthisthefirstletterlikethis第一封信呢？you'vereceived?（气喘吁吁地说）.这不是偶然的Oh,my.Thiscan'tbehappening.我不想回家！Ican'tgohome!我的叔叔又会把我卖♥&heartsfMyunclewillsellmeagain.oh不不萧梅你哪里也不会去Oh,no,no,xiao-Mei,you'renotgoinganywhere.hey你对卡洛斯和我来说都非常重要Hey,you'remuchtooimportanttoCarlosandme.我们会为这个去争取你并获得胜利We'regonnafightthisandwe'regonnawin.加布你不能对她做出承诺Gaby,youcan'tpromiseherthat.布里你已经听到她所说的Bree,youheardwhatshesaid.我不能让这个可怜的小孩回到中国Ican'tletthispoorkidgobacktoChina变成别人的奴隶andbecomesomeone'sslave.谢谢你Thankyou.好好听着我的朋友会关注这件事情的进展的Allright.1.ook,myfriendswannatakesomeofthistogo,那么打住我们喝这个咖啡有点打不起精神sopackitup,andwe'realittlelowoncoffee.你真的让我们吃这个？You'reactuallygonnaletmeeatthis?WelI你真的工作很努力Well,you'vebeenworkingsohard,一直在外商务旅行offonbusinesstripsallthetime.今晚我们要把医生的警告和胆固醇都抛到九霄云外Tonight,Wethrowcautionandcholesteroltothewind.你应该得到一个略微丰盛的晚餐Youdeservealittlecomfortfood.哦不你怀孕了Oh,no,you'repregnant.上帝你老想到不好的地方God,yourmindgoestodarkplaces.甜心你刚刚给我准备一盘全脂的干酪Honey,youjustservedmeaplateoffull-fatgouda.那怎么了？What'sup?那好Okay,well.记得我曾经帮助艾得的感情生活吗？RememberIwashelpingedsparkuphislovelife?是的你给他的老婆送了些i.m.s.有什么不对的吗？Yeah,yousenthiswifethosesexyI.M.S.Why?弗兰后来发现那些不是艾得送的Well,Franfoundoutthateddidn'tsendthem,所以她气炸了andsheblewhertop.她想要相关负责任的人走人Shewantstheresponsiblepartyfired,艾得撒了个谎然后告诉她andedliedandtoldher.是你送的Thatyousentthem.但这不是我是你But.butitwasn'tme.Itwasyou.我知道Iknow.噢噢艾得不可能失去你Oh,oh,butedcouldn'tpossiblyloseyou.不不不我变成了牺牲品No,no,no,mtheexpendableone.听着我知道这个很没道理1.ook,Iknowit'sridiculous,但艾得不是一个有理智的人butedisnotarationalperson.弗兰已经责备过他了Franhashimwhipped,而一个受到责备的丈夫我们必须谨慎的对待他andawhippedhusbandissomeonewemusttakeveryseriously.好吧Okay.我们怎么办？Howdowehandlethis?你在合同期中You'reundercontract.除非艾得有理由否则他没法开除你Edcan'tfireyouunlesshehasjustcause.所以等到这场风波结束你就是个模范雇员了Sountilthisblowsover,youhavetobeamodelemployee.只要出现这一次就无需3瓶马提尼的午餐了Showupontime,nomore3-Martinilunches,最重要的是这只是一场戏andaboveall,havereadyallyourpresentations.我不能想象我竟然成了一个受害者Ican'tbelievembeingvictimizedlikethis.甜心为了让这个事情进展顺利Well,honey,inallfairness.无论如何都要把这些事情完成Thoseareallthingsyoushouldbedoinganyway.好！Fine!安德鲁我让彼得明天晚上过来一起吃晚饭Andrew,IamhavingPeteroverfordinnertomorrownigh而我想知道你是不是愿意邀请贾斯丁一起来？andIwaswonderingifyouwouldliketoinviteJustin?谢我今晚给他打电♥话♥Yeah.Um,thanks.ll.llcallhimtonight.既然你们都有自己的男友Sinceyoutwoarehavingyourboyfriendsover,我能不能邀请马修？跑题了canIinviteMatthew?Outofthequestion.所以我直说吧-你可以和一个IUSh（酒醉后和别人调情）约会Soletmegetthisstraight.Youcandatealush,而他可以带他的同性恋男友回来andhecanbringoverhisgaylover,但是上帝啊禁止我约会一个性感的黑人butgodforbidIdateahotblackguy.除非他们能把卡博关住UntiltheylockCalebup,否则我不想你去接近他们家任何人1don'twantyouanywherenearthatfamily.他的兄弟差点玷污了你Hisbrothertriedtorapeyou,而他的母亲把他关在了地下室andhismotherkeepstheguylockedupinabasement.我的意思是承认吧丹妮尔其实你可以找个更好的Imean,letsfaceit,Danielle,evenyoucoulddobetter.你什么时候站到母亲那边来批判我了？Sincewhendoyoutakemom,ssideovermine?你的弟弟和我之间谈了一次YourbrotherandIhadatalk,而且我们交换了各自的意见andwe'vecometoadetenteofsorts.真的吗？甚至在他把你灌醉让你失去了信托基金后Really?Evenaftershescrewedyououtofyourtrustfund?well他确实虚伪地控诉我虐待儿童Well,hedidfalselyaccusemeofchildabuse.我会说我们打平了你说呢安德鲁？Iwouldsaywe'reeven.Wouldn,tyou,Andrew?当然妈我们打平了Sure,mom.We,reeven.（低声说话）你能不能现在停止你虚伪的笑容Youcanstopsmilingnow.我知道你的面部已经僵硬了什么？Iknowyourfaceistired.What?我不愚蠢我知道你还和以前那样恨她mnotstupid.Iknowyouhatehernowasmuchasever.妈妈和我现在相处的很好MomandIareinagoodplacerightnow.为什么你不能理解不了呢？Whycan'tyoubelievethat?hi我收到你的消息了什么事？Hi.Igotyourmessage.What,sup?进来说Comeonin.这是奥利弗韦斯顿ThisisOliverWeston.他是个私♥家♥侦♥探♥伊迪雇他的He'sap.I.Ediehired.伊迪雇了个.侦探？Ediehireda.p.I.?yeah他正在监视你和卡尔Yeah.He,sbeenspyingonyouandKarl.你好？Howyoudoing?他认为你和他之间有风流事Hethinksyoutwohavebeenhavinganaffair.我和卡尔？MeandKarl?你为什么要这么认为呢？Whywouldyouthinkthat?（卡尔）来吧苏你知道的我们注定是要在一起的Comeon,suze.Youknowwe'remeanttobetogether.（苏珊的声音）卡尔不要Kartjuststop.Well.这是卡尔一个人在怀念过去ThatisKarlbeingnostalgic.（卡尔）你说你自己经历的Yousaidyourself上周的性事是你目前为止最棒的thesexlastweekwasthebestyoueverhad.（录音机停止）okayum.Okay,um.首先这个不是我说经历最好的Firstofall,itwasnotthebestsexIeverhad.我说那个只是会让他感觉很不错Ijustsaidthattomakehimfeelbetter.（密语）显然你才是我说经历最棒的那位Obviously,youwerethebestsexIeverhad.原来我脸上的一拳是这么来的Thatexplainsthepunchintheface.如果你不闭嘴我会再给你一拳mgonnahityouagainifyoudon'tshutup.我知道这个看上去很糟糕-Iknowthatthislooksbad.你确实在伊迪背后和卡尔鬼混YouwereactuallyfoolingaroundwithKarlbehindEdie,sback.不不不！不卡尔骗了我No,no,no!No,Karlliedtome.他告诉我他之前已经和伊迪分手了一HetoldmethatheandEdiehadsplitupbefore.你知道吗？我不关心这个麦克Youknowwhat?Idon'tevencare.Mike.（奥利弗）我们结束了吗？（爰克）当然Arewedonehere?-Yeah.晚安苏珊Goodnight,Susan.哦Oh.你等一下等一下等一下um.Hey!Hey,you,wait,wait,wait.Um.你能不能不把这个告诉伊迪Okay,youcannottellEdieaboutthis.无论她给你多少价钱我给你双倍Whatevershe'spayingyou,llpayyoudouble.她给我2000元的佣金加上开支Shepaida2-grandretainerplusexpenses.$2,000?$2,000?呀!我应该也搞房♥地♥产♥Jeez!Igottagetintorealestate.我没那么多现金Okay,Idon'thavethatkindofcash.WeII那么我应该把录音带给布利特小姐了Well,then,IguessItakethetapetomissbritt.我有备份！Ihaveacopy!啊Ugh!Okay我们试试另外的办法Okay,let'strythisanotherway.你给她录音带就好像在这里释放了一个核弹Youareabouttounleashanuclearexplosion.这里的生活都会被摧毁1.ivesaregoingtoberuined.我来告诉你lltellyouwhat.我会直到周一才去给布利特小姐llholdofftillMondaytoreporttoMs.Britt.好!那会给你些时间去凑些现金Yes!That'llgiveyousometimetoscrapetogetheralittlecash.如果我凑不齐呢？WhatifIcan't?我很抱歉萧梅错过r所有申诉的最后期限msorry,butxiao-Meimissedallofherappealdeadlines.就这样吗？你要把她送会中国？Sothat,sit?You'rejustgonnasendherbacktoChina?我是公平的Myhandsaretied.如果你的女仆和一个美国公民成婚IfyourmaidweremarriedtoanAmericancitizen,或者她有个美国公民的孩子orhadachildwhowasanAmericancitizen,或者她是个知名的娱乐界人orifshewereawell-knownentertainer.呃Uh.如果她为一个美国公民怀孕了怎么办？WhatifshewaspregnantwithanAmericancitizen?uh,萧梅？Uh,xiao-Mei?（咯咯笑）我们同国土安♥全♥部♥谈过了Wespoketohomelandsecurity,而且我们有好消息！andwehavegoodnews!我能留下来？Icanstay?Mm-hmm!哦!（哭喊着）谢谢你们！Oh!Thankyou!哦!谢谢你们!Oh!Okay.Thankyou!呃有件很小的事情Uh.well,there'sjustonelittlething.（咯咯笑）呃Um.在这个国家移♥民♥法非常难搞定Theimmigrationlawshavegottenreallytoughinthiscountry,所以我们离成功还有最后一点点sowe'realittlebehindtheeightballgoingin.但我们为了你的事情申诉rButwepledyourcase,而且我们从头到底都为了你奋斗最后法律允许你继续留下来andwefoughttoothandnail,andthelawsaysyoucanstay.但只有当你怀着我们的孩子Butonlyifyouhaveourbaby.什么？What?代理人说如果你.Theagentsaidthatifyouwere.为一个美国公民怀孕PregnantwithanAmericancitizen,然后他们就不能遣返你thentheycouldn'tdeportyou.所以我们考虑你需要怀一个孩子Sowethought,youneedababyinyourbelly,我们需要一个代♥孕♥母亲weneedasurrogate.你赢-他赢我赢Win-win-win.”代孕-母-亲”?"Sur-ro-gate11?这会是我们的孩子Oh,well,itwouldbeourbaby.它只是在你体内成长Itwouldjustbegrowinginsideofyou.我.I.Okay,uh.well.呃.哦!就像这样Uh.oh!Okay,it'slikethis.我们三个正在做你们的著名的四川包子ThethreeofusaremakingyourfamousSzechuandumplings,（咯咯地笑）我是生面团Andmthedough,而卡洛斯是猪肉（译注：Pork也可指与女性发&hearts性♥关♥系♥）andCarlosisthepork,而你就是烤箱andyou'retheoven.我要有孩子了？！Ihavebaby?!okay我们能包办一切事情Okay,wetakecareofeverything.你知道uh医院开销Youknow,uh,hospitalbills孕妇服装以及心理助产课andmaternityclothesandIamazeclasses.而且理所应当你不必干任何家务活了And,ofcourse,youwouldn'thavetodoanywork.（笑）welluh可能的话就只有些打扫J1.作Well,uh,maybejustalittlelightdusting.没有别的了Nothingmajor.不要！No!不萧梅你已经没有后路了No,xiao-Me1.youdon'thaveachoice.要不这么办要不你只能回中国了It'seitherthisorgobacktoChina.不要孩子！Notobaby!不要！（哭泣）（痛苦地呻♥吟♥）No!只好我们自己打扫了不是吗？Hadtopushthedusting,didn'tyou?（叹息）彼得我不认为自己现在不切合实际Peter,Idon'tthinkmbeingunreasonablehere.这并不是我要去宣传我过去的沉溺的丑事It,snotlikemgonnaadvertisemyaddictionhistory,但是如果你的孩子问了一个直率的问题butifyourkidsaskadirectquestion,我并不想欺骗他们mnotgonnalietothem.好!啊哈这是不错Right!Uh-huh.Goodpoint.（低声）听着我并不是希望你去欺骗他们1.isten,Idon'texpectyoutolie关于酒精的事情我的意思他们想知道我们是怎么认识的aboutthealcoholism.Imean,theyknowthat'showwemet.这个.你知道其他事情It,sjust.Youknow,theotherthing.哦!其实事情他们只是想去认识你Oh!Theotherthing.They'rejustgettingtoknowyou,所以我想让他们关注你好的一面andso1wantthemtofocusonyourgoodqualities.我不知道他们的反应Ijustdon'tknowhowthey'llreact如果他们知道你是个对性上瘾的人iftheyfindoutthatyou'reasexaddict你那么高兴干吗？Whatareyousohappyabout?你知道妈让你过去多么愤怒吗Youknowhowyouweremadatmom关于不让马修来参加晚餐的事情？aboutnotlettingMatthewcometodinner?是？Yeah?我刚想出了最好的办法Ijustfiguredoutthefunniestway你可以报复她foryoutogetbackather.Okay今天如何安排的？Okay,what'sontheschedulefortoday?我已经准备要讲关于波士顿玩具的介绍了1havegottheBostontoypresentationreadytogo.实际上我现在没太多时间做定夺Actually,Idon'thavetimeforafullpitch,所以就给我几个要点好了sojustgivemethegist.对不起？Excuseme?你知道简单点给我一行就行Youknow,boilitdown.Givemeoneline.okay一言以蔽之玩具很有趣Okay,basically,it's"toysarefun."我不喜欢你为什么不喜欢呢？我只说了三个词Ihateit.Howcanyouhateit?Ionlygaveyouthreewords.我就是不喜欢这三个词It'sthreewordsIhate.我来接手波士顿玩具公♥司♥的介绍事宜Okay,mgonnatakeovertheBostontoycompanyaccount.不你不能接手同时No,youcannottakeover.Inthemeantime,你们都将意识到我不喜欢youshouldallbeawareIdon'tliketheway你们这些人填写费用报告的方式youpeoplehavebeenfilingyourexpensereports.有很多是故意填进去的There'sbeenalotofpadding.同时我们公&hearts词♥正在为此出血Meanwhile,thiscompanyishemorrhagingmoney.我要让这种现象停止mgonnaputastoptoit,所以我已经雇佣了一名善于法律的审计师soIhavehiredaforensicaccountant.他会浏览这些报告并确保任何项目都是正确的He'sgonnagothroughthem,makesureeverything'skosher.而我发现了一条收据有一栏的表格可疑AndIfindonereceipt,onebartabthat'sfishy,大量的人面临被解聘it'sgroundsfordismissal.oh斯加沃？Oh,Scavo?他会从你这里开始He'sgonnastartwithyou.我不能相信那个狗♥娘♥养♥的Ican'tbelievethatsonofabitch雇佣了一名审计师hiredaforensicaccountant.显然比我想象中要严重的多He'smorewhippedthanIthoughtwell悲惨的是他严重低估了我们Well,he,stragicallyunderestimatedus.危机正在袭来Theglovesarecomingoff.你知道要不我离职算了Youknow,maybeIshouldjustquit.什么？昨天你还坚定信心What?Yesterdayyouwereupinarms.而现在你就准备投降了？如果艾得决定要解雇我不久Nowyou'rereadytocave?Ifedisdeterminedtogetme,soonerorlater,他肯定可以把我解雇掉这只是个时间问题he,sgonnagetme.It'sjustamatteroftime.不不!我们不能先投降了No,no!Wearenotbackingdown.我现在就要到艾得的办公室去评评理mgonnawalkovertoEd'sofficerightnow,如果你被踢出公♥司♥我一定要弄的一清二楚andmgonnamakeveryclearthatifyou'reoutthedoor,我们确实现在有点弱势但我们不能两个都没工作mrightbehindy