YoungSheldon《小谢尔顿》第七季第五集完整中英文对照剧本.docx

J世上没人比我强壮JJNobodyelseisstrongerthanIamJJ昨天我移了一座山JJYesterdayImovedamountainJJ我相信我能当你的英雄）JIbetIcouldbeyourheroJ4J我是个了不起的小家伙JJIamamightylittlemanJtJ1我是个了不起的小家伙J/IamamightylittlemanJ*少年谢尔顿少年谢尔顿前情提要PreviouslyonYoungSheldon.谢尔顿库珀SheldonCooper.什么What?我看完了我叫谢尔顿库珀Ifinishedreadingit.Myname'sSheldonCooper.什么你看完了What.Youfinishedit?是的Yes.不错嘛你Impressive.你应该主修计算机科学Youshouldmajorincomputerscience.不了谢谢我还是读真正的科学就好No,thanks.llsticktorealscience.抱歉你不是埃文啊Excuseme,butyou'renotEvan.的确True.那埃文在哪里呢-别的地方Where'sEvan?-Elsewhere.所以你不知道Soyoudon,tknow?的确True.太好啦你认识华金了Oh,good.YoumetJoaquin.还没有正式打过招呼他在这里做什么Properintroductionswerenotmade.What,shedoinghere?他来帮忙我写一个算法Uh,he'shelpingmewriteanalgorithm这样我们就能在股海无往不利了so,uh,wecanbeatthestockmarket.为什么要赢Why?这样才能发财买♥♥帅车泡到妞Uh,well,sowecangetrich,buycoolcarsandgetgirls.主要是能泡到妞Butmostlythegirls.对知识的探索本身不就是最大的奖吗Isn'tthesearchforknowledgeitsownreward?如果这知识能帮助你泡到妞那就是奖Uh,yeah,sure,iftheknowledgehelpsyougetgirls.好脱裤子放屁的认识女生方法啊Thatseemslikealotofunnecessaryeffortjusttomeetfemales.我们也尝试过直接与她们交谈啊Yeah,we'vetriedtalkingtothem.一场真正的灾难Actualdisaster.你想帮忙我们吗Youwanttohelpus?我又不想认识女生Idon'tneedtomeetgirls.况且我更想要的是少认识一些人呢Infact,dliketoknowfewerpeople,notmore.你可以用赚来的钱给自己买♥♥好玩的东西啊Youcouldusethemoneytobuyyourselfsomethingfun.比如粒子加速器或一百罐液氮OOh,likeaparticleacceleratoror100tanksofliquidnitrogen.我指的是户外按♥摩♥浴缸之类的但也行吧Iwasthinkingofahottub,butokay.平常叫你洗澡都叫不动Ican'tgetyoutotakeashower,现在你想买♥♥户外按♥摩♥浴缸啦and-andyouwantahottub?女生们就喜欢这个Girlslikehottubs.建造粒子加速器需要多少钱Howmuchwoulditcosttobuildaparticleaccelerator?保守估计要40到100亿吧Conservatively,fourtotenbilliondollars.那你必需得帮忙我们啊Thenyouneedtohelpus.我对编程的经验不多Hmm.Well,Ihaven'tdonemuchcoding,但我十八般武艺样样精通butIamgoodateverything.行我来做主Okay,mincharge.坐一边去Scoot.你在看什么呢-查韦斯雷蒙Whatareyouwatching?-TravisLemon.那个疯狂教会男吗Thecrazychurchguy?他才不疯-他的头发就很疯啊He'snotcrazy.-Well,hishairis.我要告诉你们Well,Igotnewsfory'all.耶稣希望你们发财Jesuswantsyoutoprosper.他希望你们拥有美好的事物过富裕的生活Hewantsyoutohavenicethings,alifeofabundance.来看看这段经♥文♥Sayssorighthereinthebook."我的神必照他荣耀的丰富在基♥督♥耶稣里"MyGodshallsupplyallyourneedsaccordingtoHisriches使你们一切所需用的都充足”inglorybyJesusChrist."好吧他是这么说过He,sright.Itdoessaythat.他什么时候说完我想看音乐台When'sit'sover?1wanttowatchMTV.查韦斯牧师也有一个乐队啊ReverendTravishasaband.音乐也十分带劲Theyrockprettyhard.对你也是一样Thesameistrueforyou.耶稣基♥督♥曾用五块大麦饼就喂饱五千人Jesusfed5,000peoplewithfiveloavesofbread,但也得是有人先给他这些饼啊butsomebodyhadtogivehimthoseloaves.这就是我需要你们的地方了Andthat'swhatIneedfromyou.您捐赠给Everydollaryoudonate查韦斯雷蒙教会的钱都将十倍奉还totheTravisLemonministrywillbereturnedtoyoutenfold!十倍个大头鬼Tenfold,mysweetpatootie.种瓜得瓜种豆得豆Asyesow,soshallyereap.达芙妮把地址放上屏幕Daphne,gettheaddressonthescreen?快把你们的支票本拿出来Soyougetthecheckbookout,是时候展示你们对主的爱了andyoushowhowmuchyoulovetheLord,主也必将奉还你的爱andtheLordwillloveyouback.有一天当你的邻居问你Andwhenyourneighborasksyou,“你去哪里买♥♥的新凯迪拉克啊"你就回答他们"Where'dyougetthatnewCadillac?'1Youtell'em,”在天堂街与救世街的交叉口买♥♥的”"OnthecornerofHeavenandSaved."行吧行吧真是服了Oh,whattheheck.好啦史提夫大哥奏乐Allright,Steve-arooni,let'shitit!你好啊米希-你在干嘛呢Hey,Missy.-Hey.Whatareyoudoing?为学校买♥♥了新鞋在家先穿习惯Justbreakinginmynewshoesforschool.是棕色的They'rebrown.酷Cool.我能看你家的电视吗CanIwatchyourTV?可以啊Sure.你听到的吱嘎声是我新鞋传来的Thatsqueakingyou'rehearingismynewshoes.你妈妈人呢Where,syourmomat?她去西尔维娅阿姨家几天ShewenttomyAuntSylvia'sforafewdays.西尔维娅阿姨脖子长了一个大包AuntSylviahasabiglumponherneck.所以你自己一个人在家Soyou'realone?就我跟家里的鸡们Justmeandmychickens.比利我们必需得来办派对啊Billy,wehavetothrowaparty.给鸡们办嘛Forthechickens?不是是为我们-为什么啊No!Forus!-Why?什么叫“为什么“你妈妈不在家啊Whatdoyoumean"Why"?Yourmom'snothome.那我们派对要干嘛玩游戏吗Whatwouldwedo?Playgames?对啊饮酒游戏Yeah,drinkinggames.像你有一次给我一块钱让我♥干♥了3.8升牛奶吗1.ikewhenyoupaidmeadollartochugagallonofmilk?不一样的游戏再次向你道歉Thatwasadifferentgame,andmsorry.天那次给我吐的Boy,didIthrowup.这次的派对我们喝啤酒吧Forthisparty,mthinkingbeer.我们还没到能喝啤酒的年龄啊We'renotoldenoughtodrinkbeer.所以其他孩子才会愿意来啊That'swhykids'llcome.真聪明Smart.你觉得他们会喜欢鸡蛋吗Doyouthinkthey'lllikeeggs?我有好多鸡蛋啊Ihavesomanyeggs.那个Al变量是什么What'sthatA-sub-one-variable?它是未定义的It,sundefined.它在前一个子程序中被定义了It'sdefinedintheprevioussubroutine.我天真是优雅啊Oh,my.Thatiselegant.我们不用“优雅”这个词了Wedon'tusetheword"elegant."为什么这个词哪里不对Why?What'swrongwithit?上个学期我邀请了一个女生回我房♥间Well,lastsemester,Iinvitedagirltomyroom让她看我优雅的代码tolookatmyelegantcoding,结果她打电♥话♥报♥警♥了所以and.shecalledthepolice,so.懂了那下一步是什么Understood.Sowhathappensnext?我们就买♥♥算法推荐的股票啊Uh,wejustbuythestocksthealgorithmsuggests.用什么买♥♥-我们学贷的钱Withwhat?-Ourstudentloanmoney.你打算拿多少钱出来投Howmuchareyouinfor?我妈妈从小警告我Oh,mymother'salwayswarnedme赌博的危害againsttheevilsofgambling.这不是赌博啊这是数学Well,it'snotgambling,it-it'smath.你妈妈反对数学吗Isyourmotheragainstmath?当我尝试用数学来证明Well,whenyouuseittoprove地球并不是用七天造出来的时她有些不悦theEarthwasn'tmadeinsevendays,shegetsalittletouchy.你自己决定吧It,syourcall.要粒子加速器还是不要粒子加速器Particleaccelerator,ornoparticleaccelerator?我去拿我的钱袜子1.etmefetchmymoneysock.你把钱藏在袜子里吗Youkeepyourmoneyinasock?我姥姥还把钱藏在胸罩里呢Mymeemawkeepshermoneyinherbra.她喜欢户外按♥摩♥浴缸吗Doesshelikehottubs?你跟戴尔最近处得怎么样啊SohowareyouandDalegettingalong?我骑了11公里的自行车Well,Irodeabikesevenmiles来你家跟你喝咖琲你说呢tohavecoffeewithyou,sothatshouldtellyou.不太顺利Notgoingwell?其实还行啦Oh,it'sfine.只是当你独自一人住了那么久It,sjust,afteryou,velivedbyyourselfforalongtime,重新跟人合住还是需要时间习惯havingaroommatetakesalittlegettingusedto.我相信戴尔也很努力啦msureDale'sdoinghisbest.我就怕这个That'smyfear.玛丽这个捐给RTLM的50块是干嘛的Mare,what'sthis$50toan"R.T.L.M."?是给查韦斯雷蒙牧师教会的ReverendTravisLemonMinistries.我捐款Imadeadonation.那个发型很怪的怪咖吗Thegoofyguywiththehair?他不是什么怪咖啦He,snotgoofy,他传的福音也说到了我的心坎里andhepreachesthegospelinawaythatspeakstome.那我也掏心窝子跟你说说Yeah,weltletmespeaktoyou.我们没有多余的50块能乱花Wecan'tbethrowingaway50bucks.这不是在乱花Wearenotthrowingitaway.到时候我们会连本带利拿回这笔钱Wearegonnagetthatmoneybackplussome.亲爰的我的天Oh,honey,now,comeon.你不会真♥相♥信他的狗屁吧Youcan'tpossiblybelievethatB.S.或许吧杳韦斯牧师说耶稣希望我们发财Maybe.ReverendTravissaysthatJesuswantsustoprosper.所以Isthatwhy耶稣才一口气把我家给吹得灰飞烟灭吗hehuffedandpuffedandblewmyhousedown?我要把这张支票作废-你敢mcancellingthischeck.-Don'tyoudare.玛丽这可是一周的买♥♥菜钱Mary,thisisgroceriesforaweek.我们会拿回来的心里要有信念Wewillgetitback.Wejustneedtohavefaith.你可以劝你女儿醒醒吗Willyoutalksomesenseintoyourdaughter?如果我说得动她IfIcouldtalksenseintoher,她就不会嫁给你了shewouldneverhavemarriedyou.她不嫁不行因为肚子被我搞大了哈ShehadtomarrymebecauseIgotherpregnant.Ha!但钱的事情他没说错Heain'twrongaboutthemoney,111射谢Thankyou!两位在短短八个小时内Well,gentlemen,we'vedoubledourincome我们的收入翻倍了inalittleovereighthours.我需要更大的袜子了mgonnaneedabiggersock.好消息是我们的算法有用Thegoodnewsis,ouralgorithmisworking,而且每一笔交易都令它更有效率了andit'sgettingmoreefficientwitheverytrade.所以我们心要坚定Whichiswhywehavetostaystrong.我们不能指望一夜就成为百万富翁Wecan'texpecttobemillionairesovernight.会需要.It'lltake.12到14个交易日12to14businessdays.真的要发生了It,sactuallygonnahappen.我要打到炮了mgonnahavesex.你要去哪里Whereareyougoing?去沐浴净身Totakeashower.我能跟你说两句吗Hey,canItalktoyou?行怎么啦Yeah.What'sup?还是进去说吧Actually,inthere.你不会是怀孕了吧Youain'tpregnant,areyou?当然不是你怎么可以这么想No.Howcouldyousaythat?!我们家的传统嘛Beenknowntohappen.好Okay.比利的妈妈出远门我们想办个派对So,Billy'smom'saway,andwe'rethrowingaparty.好吧Allright.你觉得如果我偷几瓶爸爸的啤酒他会发现吗DoyouthinkifItooksomeofDad'sbeer,he'dnotice?你觉得他会不会发现呢Doyouthinkhe'dnotice?好吧是我问盘问题了Okay,dumbquestion.而且你还太小了不应该喝酒啊Anyways,you'retooyoung.Youshouldn'tbedrinking.你刚刚才问我是不是怀孕了YoujustaskedifIwaspregnant.建议你两件都不要做Well,don'tdoeither.如果我给你钱你不愿意帮我们买♥♥一箱啤酒吗Soyouwouldn'tbuyusacaseofbeerifIgaveyouthemoney?米希我自己都还没到喝酒年龄呢Missy,mnotoldenoughtobuybeer.这从来也没有阻挡过你啊That'sneverstoppedyoubefore.对此我深感惭愧Andmashamedofmyself.我告诉你我能帮你什么lltellyouwhatIcando.我有比啤酒更适合派对的东西Igotsomethingforapartythat'sbetterthanbeer.什么What?冲天炮罗马蜡烛M80鞭炮应有尽有Bottlerockets,Romancandles,M80s,theworks.慎棒”啊谢谢了Oh,sure.Thanks.你现在瞧不起这些但你相信我You'renotexcitednow,buttrustme,等你炸了谁家的邮箱你的派对就成了youblowuponemailbox,andyougotyourselfaparty.需要帮忙吗Needahand?好啊谢谢Yeah,sure.你在我这个年纪的时候有去外面参加派对吗Hey,so,whenyouweremyage,didyougoanyparties?当然啦Oh,yeah.好的派对我记忆犹新赞的派对嗨到断片ThegoodonesIremember,thegreatones.gone.真是太酷了Thatissocool.是啊我是挺酷的Ah,Iwasprettycool.有人邀请你去吗Yougetinvitedtoone?算是吧Kindof.快跟我说说Ooh,tellme.我算是在帮忙我朋友办吧msortofhelpingmyfriendthrowit.第一场派对吗这可是大事啊Firstparty.That'sabigdeal.有什么建议吗Anyadvice?这个嘛首先呢Hmm.WelLfOrstarters,音乐很重要musiciskey.选曲要好音量要大Youwantitgood,youwantitloud,但也不能大到被人报♥警♥butnotsoloudthecopscome.虽然警♥察♥来过之后你会成为传奇人物Although,iftheydo,you'realegend.真属♥Damn.如果你们设置了亲热点Andifyouhavemake-outspots,最好要能保持私密但又别太私密youwanttokeep'emprivate,butnottooprivate.你懂的衣柜啊储物间之类的Youknow,closets,pantries.毕竟还是希望他们只能站着懂你意思Youwanttokeepyourguestsstanding.-Makessense.我还听说.And,um,veheard其中有些派对还会喝酒吗atsomeofthesepartiesthere'sdrinking?有时候会啦Well.yeah,sometimes,不过but,uh,不喝酒也还是能享乐子啊funcanbehadwithout.it.我就只是问问啦Uh-huh,butjustincase,你会愿意帮我们买♥♥酒吗wouldyoubuyitforus?不行为什么No.-Whynot?因为你还是小孩子Becauseyou'reakid.你那时也是小孩子Youwereakid.但这不一样-哪里不一样Yeah,butitwasdifferent.-How?重点是我现在当妈妈了Thepointis,I'mamomnow.是个酷妈妈Acoolmom.也没那么酷Notthatcool.再说我唯一愿意帮他Besides,theonlyunderageperson买♥♥酒的未成年人是我孩子她爸thatmgonnabuyalcoholforisthefatherofmychild.你真是一点都不酷Youreallyaren'tcool.谢谢你见我Thanksforseeingme.应该的我的大门始终打开Ofcourse,mydoorisalwaysopen.抽烟吗Smoke?不用了我吸你的二手烟就好mgood.lljustbreatheinyours.随你的便Suityourself.你能回避一下吗Couldwehavealittleprivacy?我出去也只是扒在门边偷听lljustbelisteningatthedoor.是真的Shedoes.你找我们有什么事So,whatcanwedoforyou?我在想或许是时候Well,1wasthinkingmaybeitwastime让玛丽回来教堂工作了forMarytocomebacktothechurch.回归到民众牛群中间Youknow,beapartofyourherdagain.我们一般称作教众羊群Wesayflock.不过在德州说牛群也行Although,Texas-herdworks.毕竟德州牛肉最有名Withallthebeefandwhatnot.我们随时欢迎玛丽回来Well,Mary'salwayswelcome.太好了Great.或许她能待在办公室帮忙Oh.Maybeyoucoulduseherbackhereintheoffice.不用我们能搞定Nah,wegotthingscovered.你要不要去接电♥话♥Doyouneedtoanswerthat?没事他们会再打来No,they'llcallback.佩吉麻烦接一下Peg,please.知道了真霸道Allright,bossy.那么So,uh.你意下如何whatdoyouthink?玛丽说她想回来吗Marysaidshewantstocomeback?她没有明说Notinsomanywords.但你要是能主动问她ButIknowifyouaskedher,我会超级开心itwouldjustmeantheworldtome,她和我们都会开心toher,tous.上帝也开心ToGod.我会为此祷告的llprayonit.好极了Great.我迟点再祷告llprayonitlater.好好Right.Sure.真有意思Fascinating.你怎么不按我说的做Whyaren'tyoudoingwhatItellyou?我们发财了没Werichyet?最好是发Yeah,webetterbe.埃文放飞rEvanwentnuts.居然买♥♥了大蒜面包Hegotgarlicsticks.你们有人授权了算法Dideitherofyouauthorizethealgorithm去进行国际交易吗tomakeforeigntrades?没有啊-没有No.-No.可是它正在这么做Well,that'swhatit'sdoing.我们在香港交易所持有七千股Weown7,000sharesofChowFatEnterprises周发企业的股票ontheHongKongexchange.真有意思Fascinating.我刚才也是这么说That'swhatIsaid.它在自动交易吗It'stradingonitsown?看起来是的Itwouldseemso.我们得制止它快拔插头Uh,we.needtostopit,pulltheplug.等一下等一下0h,wait,wait,wait.现在股票在升还是跌Areweupordown?在升We'reup.那有什么问题Thenwhat'stheproblem?问题是我们失去控制了Theproblemiswe'velostcontrol.这宛如弗兰肯斯坦创造的怪物ThisisFrankenstein'smonster.你把这说的像是坏事一样Yousaythatlikeit'sabadthing.什么What?让死人复生Toreanimatelifewas是了不起的科学成就anincrediblescientificachievement这个故事里真正的坏人是那群无知的村民Therealbadguysinthestoryaretheignorantvillagers.你站在怪物那一边吗Youwereonthemonster,sside?因为与众不同就被人不公地追捕Unfairlyhoundedforbeingdifferent?我当然支持它了Youbetcha.你们快看Guys,guys,guys.周发分股了ChowFatstockjustsplit.我们现在有一万四千股Wehave14,000shares.我们创造的算法在自我进化So,Wecreatedanalgorithmthat'sevolvingbyitself变成新形态的智慧了吗andbecominganewformOfintelligence?本人谢尔顿库珀AndI,SheldonCooper,真心认为这是大好事wholeheartedlythinkit'sterrific.它可能在监听Itmaybelistening.超♥rh♥我们怎么做Howdowedothis?在这里等一个Wejustgottowaitforsomeone已经成年能买♥♥啤酒who'soldenoughtobuybeer但又够年轻够开明的人butyoungenoughtobecool.好Gotit.问他试试-先生请问Tryhim.-Excuseme,sir-你自己买♥♥啤酒Buyyourownbeer.谢谢Thankyou.他好像知道我们的心思Ithinkhewasontous.让我试试1.etmetry.你能帮我买♥♥啤酒吗我的证件落在家里了Wouldyoubuymebeer?IforgotmyIDathome.你几岁Howoldareyou?30岁Thirty.25岁Twenty-five?这招行不通Thisisn'tworking.可能我们就不该办派对Maybethepartywasabadidea.先生Hey,mister,你能不能帮我们买♥♥啤酒willyoubuyussomebeer?我没到买♥♥酒年龄mnotoldenough.那些人以为我是大人ThoseguysthoughtIwasagrown-up.比利Billy!什么What?给你找零-谢谢Here'syourchange.-Thankyou.你可以走了Youcangonow.I断射Thankyou.你好啊邻居Howdy,neighbor.杰夫牧师见到你真高兴PastorJefChownicetoseeyou.我有没有打扰你Am1interruptinganything?没有快请进No,no,comeonin.你怎么来了So,whatbringsyouby?我最近在想Well,I'vebeenthinking,uh,教会的大家都很想念你wereallymissyouoveratthechurch不知你有没有考虑过【可来andmaybeyoumightconsidercomingback.这个嘛Well.你很贴心但我已经加入新教会了that'sawfulkindofyou,butvejoinedanewchurch.你被循道宗拉拢了对不对Oh!TheMethodistsgotyou,didn'tthey?不Oh,no.是查韦斯雷蒙牧师ReverendTravisLemon.怎么会是那个留怪发型的人Oh,notthefellawiththehair.玛丽他就是个江湖骗子Mary,he,sasnakeoilsalesman,拿走大家钱财takingpeople'smoney哄骗他们说会暴富andpromising'emallkindsofriches.那么Well.你如何解释国税局寄来的这张支票呢ThenhowdoyouexplainthischeckIgotfromtheIRS?八百块$800.我给了查韦斯牧师50块IsentReverendTravis$50第二天就收到这张支票andthatcametheverynextday.拜托Oh,comeon.支票肯定在你给钱之前就已经寄出了Ithadtobeinthemailbeforeyousentyourmoneyin.真的吗Didit?当然我非常爱国Ofcourse.maspatrioticasthenextguy,但也不得不承认我们的邮政服务是坨大便butourpostalserviceflat-outsucks.抱歉我用词太粗俗了ExcusemyFrench.我们不苟同Well,wedisagree.查韦斯牧师说主希望我们ReverendTravissaysthattheLordwantsme兴旺发达我相信他tobeprosperousandIbelievehim.这只是个巧合Thisisnothingbutacoincidence.你税交多了Youoverpaidyourtaxes,就会退还这和耶稣没关系yougotarefund,Jesushasnothingtodowithit.你这口气好像谢尔顿YousoundlikeSheldon.我先走了不用送IbelieveIknowmywayout.帮我搬一下Helpmemovethis,willyou?你在干什么Whatareyoudoing?腾出地方当舞池Makingadancefloor.我很会热舞哦-真的吗maverygooddancer.-Really?我妈妈说的你看Mymomsaysso.Watch.我去接I'llgetit.斯巴克斯家宝贝Sparks'residence.-Hey,sweetie.妈妈Oh.Hey,Mom.你一个人在家没事吧Youokaythereallbyyourself?我不是一个人米希也在mnotbymyselfMissy'shere.等等她不在W-wait,she'snothere.叫她听电♥话♥Putheron.好的Okay.斯巴克斯太太Hey,Mrs.Sparks.你们在搞什么鬼Whatarey'allupto?只是闲聊Justhangingout.放屁Cutthecrap.你们要办派对对不对Youthrowingaparty,ain'tyou?什么没有啊What?No.淡定我很支持你们Relax,mallforit.我也希望我儿子有社交生活Iwantmysontohavealife.等等他有受邀吧Wait,he'sinvitedright?当然我们正在腾出地方当舞池'Course,We,rejustmakingadancefloor.老天米希千万别让他